Many of the “lessons” from the Star’s popular relationships column, Dating Diaries, deal with the sad, painful, or absurd reality of “being single and watching” in a city. But there are also happier and more optimistic lessons, such as: sometimes you just know. Sometimes it really works out. Many of our diarists related the date they met their eventual husband, wife, or otherwise “forever person” — sometimes on a date that didn’t seem quite as promising or different from the others at first.
(If you have a story to tell, we want to hear it — details on how you too can become a dating journal writer at the bottom of the piece.)
When “Bernard” decided to start dating online in his 50s, he had “gave up the idea of being with anyone again.” The first person to comment on his dating profile was ‘Greta’. He said: “There were about 10 other messages from women coming in after hers, but I was immediately drawn to Greta’s photo: she was a smiling, sweet-looking person who radiated warmth and sincerity.” When they met, Bernard said, “I saw Greta come in, smiling and looking for me. She was everything her photos showed, and more. I’ve always despised the idea of love at first sight, but this was it. than.” After admitting he was ‘petrified’, they chatted for over two hours and then went for a walk: “As cliché as it may sound, and would have sounded to me hours earlier, I knew I was walking next to the woman with whom I wanted to walk for the rest of my days.”
“Adam” met “Christina” at the mall and convinced her to come to a party at his house that night. Adam had also invited other women who were interested in him—which Christina noted. When she left Adam didn’t know if he would ever see her again, but the next morning Christina showed up at Adam’s house again to accept his offer to go ice skating the night before. “She froze to death, but was prepared for anything. Perfect.” Adam later asked her why she had come to the party, and she said a psychic had told her that “her future depended on her being open about the kind of people she dated.” Three months later, they were engaged.
“Liem”‘s roommate was dating “Veronica’s” roommate, and they all went out to get acquainted. “Coincidentally, Veronica and I were sitting opposite each other. She was “cheerful, outgoing, sweet but with a certain attitude. Her positive attitude counteracted my constant sarcasm.” They had a ‘natural rapport’ and ‘instant chemistry.’ Liem wrote: “It’s hard to put into words why two people clicked right away, right? There’s something chemical going on. But I just knew right away.” He had to leave early because he had a date that night. “The whole time I was on my date I was thinking about Veronica. I ended the date early and went back to Veronica’s apartment, where she and our roommates were still hanging out. I got her number and a few days later I asked her out for dinner. She immediately said yes. Later she told me she had plans the night she ran off.” A year later they married.
“Annabeth” cynically entered her date with “Leon”. She wrote: “I have been active on several dating sites for a number of years. It’s usually the same, over and over: connect with someone online, communicate with them via email, talk on the phone, arrange an afternoon coffee, meet, chat, feel no chemistry, see no sparks, never communicate or meet again.” However, when they met “on a warm, sunny evening,” the attraction was “mutual and immediate.” Leon “looked exactly like his picture,” and Annabeth adds, “he sounded exactly like the guy I had conversations with on the phone.” They had things in common: Annabeth and Leon had lived in the same building at the same time; they had the same GP; and they had been part of the same charity event. After a dinner of “intense” conversations, Leon invited Annabeth to his house for dinner for their second date. “We had a nice kiss in the dark, in the parking lot.” They too married two years later.
After a period of post-divorce “no dating, relationships, or muddy emotional waters,” our diarist “Lenore” met “Deckard” online. She wrote: “He asked very smart questions and answered mine with many thoughtful details. I asked him out for coffee; he raised the bar for brunch.” On the way to meet him, Lenore realized she’d been so engaged in their conversation that she’d never looked at his profile, didn’t know what he looked like, and couldn’t remember his name (she remembered being at the restaurant). saw his blue eyes.) He was already eating, which “decentered” her; she was “all over the place: nervous and shaky.” When she said she had a child, Deckard stiffened. Lenore said, “My thoughts remained on a negative track until the date officially died about 20 minutes after that. I was sure I had it up.” She realized she liked him by the end of the date, and “miraculously, he texted a few days later, apparently undaunted by my maternity status.” day their dating journal ran, as a surprising “gift” to Deckard.
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